Bad Day.

Last day of driving school was today. The girls and I went to lunch between sessions to celebrate. I had a small bowl of black beans and rice, because I needed the protein.

Then after my class, I went to the DMV to get my permit (finally!) and that's when it all went down hill. Some how my brain convinced my stomach that I needed lots of food. It thought I needed a reward for passing my test.

WRONG TEST, STUPID BODY.

So I've thrown up once today. And tonight wasn't any better.

I feel sooo weak. I tried to be strong; it didn't work.

Stupidfatstupiduglystupidloststupidbabystupidweakstupidobesestupidlost.

I disgust myself. Got on the scale: 110 pounds. What the fuck is WRONG WITH ME??

I am stuck in a rut. Tomorrow I will restrict. I will drive my sorry ass to the gym. I will burn my leg fat until the sun goes down. And then I will be clean and pink and empty inside.

I will win. I will win. I will win.

Just remember: Stay strong. It is sooo delicious when you do.

-Ivie